Support Network - California

California
	First Name: Jean Ann Email Address: jean.ann.caffee@lmco.com Comments: My son is a heroin addict 18 years old. He has been in and out of rehab approximately 4 times. Now living in a SLE, working on his sobriety. I have dealt with this for around 2 years now. As an addict, he stole, cheated, lied (you know the drill). I kept letting him stay in the house. I finally started getting tough. Now we all take one day at a time and each day is getting better.

	First Name: Alice Email Address: perryj50@aol.com Comments: If there is anyway I can help, or anything I can do, just contact me.

	First Name: Debra Email Address: Debinpville@webtv.net Comments: My two sons are addicts-alcoholics. My oldest has been in and out of jails and prisons for the last 14 years. He now has a 5 year suspended prison sentence hanging over his head, but he's still using. My youngest is only 20 and has been smoking meth since he was 16. His health is deteriorating, and the doctor wants to run tests for diabetes but he won't go. I am in a recovery program for MYSELF. I have finally realized after years and years, and trying everything in the world to help them, that I have no control, and I am tired. I am giving this to God, and learning how to detach myself from their situation. But I have to do this on a daily basis or I'm in trouble.

	First Name: Carolyn Email Address: cprov31@aol.com Comments: My 22 yr. old son is a heroin addict. He has been in and out of detox 6 times in 2 years. He has gone into programs 4 times but leaves before they are completed. Things are getting worse ..... his next step will be homeless as he cannot stay with me as I have a 4 year old to protect and grand children too. This is a nightmare but in the end GOD will answer my prayers!

	First Name: Cecelia Email Address: ceceliaatspiritt@yahoo.com Comments: I am dealing with my 24 year old daughter. She has two children, 5 & 3 years old. The father has them. She doesn't understand why everyone thinks she has a problem. She is doing fine! Her last statement after she was arrested for receiving stolen goods was to "consider her dead." I did tell her that she could not see the children until she got help. This has been very hard. A day at a time is all we can do. My hardest problem is what to tell my very bright 5 year old grandaughter. She wants to know why her mommy doesn't come home or call. She is scared that she is dead.

	First Name: Yvonne Email Address: petergeyer@earthlink.net Comments: Both my daughters are addicted to speed. I just recently learned the truth by them. I have been dealing with the loss of loved ones all around me because of addiction it seems like my whole life. Through my faith I have been able to get through it for the most part. However now I learn how little did I really help myself. My world is shattered and I'm in much needed inner strenght. I'm hopeing to find and to give encouagement and support. Finanically I'm about to lose everything, spiritually I am ready to give every bit.

	First Name: Eve Email Address: evekendall@attbi.com Comments: First, my condolences for Kathy, and thanks for hosting this site. Greetings to all the rest of you. I don't know when you posted your messages, but feel free to write if you wish. I'm good about responding. My son is addicted to pot and alcohol, and I think, is experimenting with other drugs (?cocaine). He is also in a vocational program, which finishes in 14 months. Who knows whether he will finish it? Trying not to do the enabling bit, but sure that I've made plenty of mistakes. It would be easier (odd word, I know) if he weren't also diagnosed as bipolar. Then, I THINK I wouldn't have a problem just telling him to live his life as he sees fit elsewhere, NOW. I'd like him to retain some basic mental stability (I know, grasping at straws) and continue supplying him with his meds so this is a messy transition. He spent so much on drugs, that he is unable to pay for his car insurance, can't fix the flat on one tire, and has been driving without insurance and on the spare for a couple of weeks. He will be out of this house and in his own apartment in early June. As long as he stays in school we will pay rent, he is supposed to cover his food and car expenses. My biggest problem? His lack of inhibition. He has taken to smoking in front of my house in his car in broad daylight. I am waging a daily battle to make him not smoke remotely near my presence, that of my husband or younger son. Sending my wishes to all of you to feel faith and courage in yourselves. Eve

	First Name: Rhianno Email Address: ranadans@yahoo.com Comments: I just lost my older brother from a heroine overdose Aug. 20th. He was my best friend and I'm not taking it very well. My family doesn't live her in San Diego where my brother and are from so I'm feeling kind of alone and I feel like when I talk to people about it they don't understand. My parents moved to Montana so all I can do is talk to them on the phone. How can I find a support group here in San Diego?

	First Name: Vicky Email Address: vcoggin@verizon.net Comments: The lord is good. daughter clean now for a year. but still have Ray 21 still on drugs, Rocky 18 in jail now seving 3 to 7 year for the same. Prayer is the only way. Thank you. ~ Vicky

	First Name: Nancy Email Address: fnkymama@aol.com Comments: My son is a recovering crack addict, and a gambler.he has put the family thru true hell. i should have seen it, maybe i did and said not my son. his father died of a herion overdose in 1984.i thought the pain was behind me.the pain of a addic child is god awful.he is now clean for 120 days,he is in rehab and has has two relapes.i take one day at a time,and hope to god i have the strength to go into tough love mode if needed.i've had classes for parents and how to react but when push comes to shove i hope i don't weaken,i could love him to death.he is due to come home in two days so pray for us.

	First Name: Pam Email Address: pammm3@hotmail.com Comments: MFirst, my heart and prayers go out to the amazing woman who hosts this web in the loss of her beautiful daughter, Kathy. My biggest fear is found articulated among the "grief pages." I just discovered this site last night after dropping off my son for some serious detoxing. I cried for hours as I read others' stories and thought of my only "baby." I raised him by myself since he was a couple of months old. His dad/my ex left, started another family far away, and was extemely litigious for twelve expensive and very long years. Half my family is with the Lord, and the other half is far away, don't believe, and are critical of my "rescuing attempts." I am a Christian, albeit a struggling one who has yet to "let go and let God." I've been angry with God and angry with and hurt by my son. I read the Bible to and prayed with him for years, enrolled him in a Christian school for a few years, and sacrificed everything to be both Mom and Dad to him.....which is impossible, of course, but that never deterred my efforts. My son has since embraced atheism but said that he hasn't totally eliminated the possibility that Christ/God exists. He has used the pages of two Bibles to roll up joints--hostility and rebellion, I think. Substance abuse is foreign in my family, so I have no experience there upon which to draw. My soon-to-be 22 year old son admitted himself yesterday for the first time to a hospital for detox and counseling (for hydrocodone, marijuana, and depression). He was involuntarily admitted twice for overdosing and went to the hospital emergency room a few times because of a dangerously rapid heartbeat (The drs. and I thought there was something wrong with his heart. He was even put on a monitor for a month. Turns out he was using GHB, an extremely dangerous substance that most drs. don't know how to treat let alone diagnose, to sleep.) He has in-depth knowledge of chemicals, their interactions, and their overall impact on various bodily functions. To talk with him, you'd think he had a degree in biochemistry and pharmacology. I never knew that the nutmeg in my kitchen could be (and was being) used as a psychelic substance until I couldn't find it there but found an empty bottle in his room and researched it on the Net. Although he adamantly denies ever trying heroin, he admitted injecting Stadol and experimenting with "shrooms." He also ordered (to the tune of over $350) some unpronouncable substance that far exceeds the range of LSD but is somehow legal. These last two substances were part of his drug repetoire two and one-half years ago. As I hadn't seen him catatonic or stoned in that time, I thought the worst was over. Wrong! He had developed a high tolerance for prescription pills. If I took even a tenth of what he did in one day, I wouldn't live to tell it. I've run the gamut with my son--his chronic lying, unproductivity, health problems (a great avenue to procure more meds), stealing, abusive behavior, disappearing, and denial. I've said a group prayer for all of us struggling with the forces that take our family members from us and for our loved ones caught in the grip of abuse, whether by choice, genetics, or both. As you can see, I'm not afraid to share but would also love to listen. Our problems may not be identical, but I bet our pain is. Love and prayers to all!.
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